New Year’s Resolutions in Three Easy Step

Or How I Learned to Procrastinate, Without Really Trying

Okay, so now we are in 2011.  I ate my feast of fish, and had some for lunch the day after Christmas, and the day after that.  Then my wife made me throw the rest out (down the drain) as the smell was becoming an issue.  I also ate about ten thousand other items that were above and beyond the call of duty (read: acceptable calorie count) and so now I sit and ponder, weak, and weary, over many a quaint and curious leftover of forgotten lore …

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December, 

Which had given way to more, cold and wet and dreary that is as so I continue to ponder…

But suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.

Always wondered how to best describe an idea, and so with stolen verse in hand I had an idea.  I shall make a resolution, or two.  After all it is the New Year.  And, according to some deeply imbued mythological calendar cycle it is officially the year of the procrastinator.  I am in luck.

This is why on January 4, 2011 I will make my resolution(s). 

First, I promise to add interesting insights into the world around us each and every day on my comic fiction noir blog.   Well I guess we can through that one right out the window, on so many levels.

Second, I will get a job.  Funny, that was last year’s resolution, and the year before that, oh hell…, I’ll just throw that one out too.

Third, I will stop stealing from other writers.  Forget that one.

Next, I will not curse my team when they loose.  Merde!  Well that’s a nice resolution except I won’t be able to watch those a…holes play anymore, when the h. e. double L will they ever win again. 

Next, walk the dog on a regular basis.  Hey, I already do that, yeah I found a New Year’s Resolution that I can stick to, since the dog lets me know when it is time.  This should be no problem, unless it is cold outside, or it rains, or my favorite soap is on.

Happy New Year.

“Don’t worry,” says Jim Gaffigan, “there is a bunny.”

Saverio Monachino's writing style has been termed by some as 'Kurt Vonnegut meets Mark Twain'.  Saverio describes it as 'comic fiction noir'. Regardless of the terms used, he is  attempting is to use humor to open the door to serious discussion.  You can find Saverio Monachino on www.comicfictionnoir.com.